Here are my reviews posted on our Facebook page for 2014 which you can join HERE continued from my 2013 Facebook Mini Reviews which you can read HERE
Tony: London Serial Killer (2009)
A low budget film that doesn’t look like it was filmed on a mobile phone like a lot of modern low budget British horror films do these days.
Tony is a serial killer and we never find out why. No back story explaining his childhood or motivations, no characters he interacts with for more than a scene or two (well apart from a thug who torments him at times played by the wonderful Ricky Grover) and the ending will leave most people feeling a bit short changed or is that it?
No or very little character development for anyone in the film including the main person Tony himself just like in Dredd so you would be forgiven for thinking that the story is weak and the film suffers for it.
On the contrary it’s refreshing. It plays out like an average few days in the life of this person as it happens with no major event leading to an unbelievable climax.
Yes something does happen but that’s merely a plot device to move the story along.
It’s gritty, British, even restrained and Tony is a guy who you will find yourself feeling for at times but ultimately he’s a killer and will leave you wanting to wash the thought of him out of your consciousness.
I was surprised by this when I caught it on the Horror Channel the other night.
I can see this not being everyone’s cup of tea as it’s not your usual serial killer film but has great performances with a good story that didn’t drag for me.
Want something different and British then watch it ~ Lead Cenobite
Fun horrorcomedy with an appearance from Dee Wallace.
Film students hire a cinema to run a horror marathon where they find a film from a director that went mad and killed his family. Naturally he returns.
Some good running gags and nice kills in it. Don’t take it seriously as it’s the classic 80’s-esque low budget horror which means there are flaws in the films logic and you’ll be asking why didn’t they do this? but it’s too entertaining to get hung up on the details ~ Lead Cenobite
Good film, not bad for a low budget film but it does suffer from Soap Opera Effect. Still creative monsters and was enjoyable ~ Lead Cenobite
B-movie starring Tom Skerritt, Ernest Borgnine, William Shatner and John Travoltas first film appearance.
That’s right, Ernest Borgnine, William Shatner and John Travolta in a horror film so what can go wrong…
Well not much. It was fun. The plot is about a satan worshipping cult who want a book that Christian worshipping William Shatners family have.
The film jumps straight into the story. Shatners Dad turns up asking for the book but then melts like wax and it turns out that wasn’t his dad but a duplicate. So Shatner has to give Ernest Borgnine the book to get his parents back.
So Shatner goes to confront the cult.
The film doesn’t do slow exposition to bring in new characters or setup what’s going on.
The stories been done to death so why waste time explaining it or who each character is when you don’t care.
This I found to be refreshing. Just focus on what we want to see, no pointless backstories, no trying to give us deeper characters than the film needs and NO ROMANTIC SUB PLOT!
The make up is bad for the cult members though special mention should go for Borgnines Goat like Devil make up.
That was nice and probably where most of the budget went.
It’s cheap, cheerful and cheesy. Some have said it’s one of those so bad it’s good and makes you laugh when it shouldn’t so if that’s what you get from this film then it means you was entertained which is the point in the first place.
A good film which even credits Ming the Merciless lookalike Satanist Anton LaVey as the movie’s technical advisor so give it a go ~ Lead Cenobite
Co-written, produced and starring Eli Roth this is about 3 guys who meet 3 girls in Chile when an earthquake hits and they have to survive the disaster and the locals.
Takes a while for the disaster to hit but the interactions between the two groups is entertaining. Not great dialogue but not the worst and the characters are likeable enough.
There’s the obligatory stroppy girl and idiot mate for the lads but both have a bit of depth and character development when the disaster hits which is nice.
When it finally hits it starts of with a lot of black humour and good deaths but then takes a sinister turn and becomes much darker with regards to what the group have to deal with.
For a low budget film it has some decent (again for it’s budget) CGI and some bad. It mixes in practical effects and they do a good job of making where they are look like an earthquake has hit.
Does lose its way very near the end and becomes the generic final girl versus slasher you’ve seen done in virtually every slasher film in the last 30 years.
Tiny spoiled pampered girl wins in a fight against an experienced killer twice her size that’s so unbelievable it makes you want the final girl trope to die a sudden death in horror.
Not as bad as I thought it would be but does take a while for the disaster to hit and does take a turn in the tone and plot of the film I personally didn’t like certain aspects of.
Would’ve preferred it kept to the black humour and kept to being about people surviving a disaster with lots of deaths and not about surviving the inhumane nature of people.
But when the story works I think it does succeed.
Watch it but remember it’s bad and you might enjoy it ~ Lead Cenobite
The Deaths of Ian Stone (2007)
I really liked this film especially it’s premise. Found it entertaining with an action packed ending. Need to see this again ~ Lead Cenobite
A fun, straight to the point no frills action film with a nice look.
Leave your brain at work and relax at home with this one ~ Lead Cenobite
Directed by Vincent Dawn, but for the purposes of this little review we’ll call him Bruno Mattei, and starring Ottaviano Dell’Acqua (ok I just wanted to type that name) this film is set in the usual post apocalyptic future and is about the usual biker gang of scavengers who stop of in a deserted town but run afoul of it’s hidden population…
This film is hilarious. The bikers arrive at the town where the leader jumps of his bike, looks around for a second, then declares it safe (watch it to see how ridiculous it is) to the black woman who gets covered in flour and runs around shouting “I’m White!” to the conveyor belt with little toy rats glued to it used to show a marching horde.
The rats really couldn’t give a toss. They are rats after all and I doubt being paid as well as the actors though I doubt the actors were paid that much to start with.
It’s funny seeing the actors running around in fear and waving flaming torches to rats who barely acknowledge their existence.
In fact when the flaming torch is thrown to the ground the rats actually run up to it.
Bad acting, worse dialogue and worserer special effects this is a joy to watch.
Classic 80’s Italian horror.
I should mention I watched this on the ‘Beyond Terror’ label.
If you don’t know Mike Lee, one of the men behind Vipco, re-released some of the old Vipco catalogue but with no changes what-so-ever.
Vipco were famous in the UK for releasing VHS prints on DVD without remastering them but claiming the version was “Digitally Remastered”. They would claim a film was “uncut” but in reality the print sent to the BBFC had been previously been cut, usually sourced from another country where the cuts were made or from the VHS print they had whereas if they had submitted a print with the cuts restored the BBFC probably would’ve passed them.
They would classify films as 18 when the film was really a 15.
That said the film doesn’t really suffer from the cuts as you don’t notice where they were made
The cover does say the film was “previously Banned” but I find no evidence of it being banned in the UK so maybe it was elsewhere and that’s what it’s alluding to.
With a WTF? ending this hugely enjoyable and farcical film belongs on the ‘Beyond Terror’ label. Perfect bed fellows.
Watch it. Fantastico ~ Lead Cenobite
I didn’t know anything about this going into it, in fact I couldn’t remember why I wanted to watch it in the first place (still cant) so I was more then a little surprised when it started and this old time western was actually set in modern day Australia.
Cowboy hats, riding horse back everywhere, a town that has more than a few “saloon” looking buildings and everyone has a rifle.
Don’t misunderstand me, this isn’t Aussies with bad John Wayne accents, this is very much Australia but with that yeehaa cowboy twist to it.
Maybe Australia is like that and Neighbours lied to me.
So the story revolves around a young police officers first day in his new job and in a new town when a local in jail for murder escapes from a prison and decides to head back to town for revenge.
About the only thing people online agree with is the vistas in this film are stunning and they are.
Beautiful scenery in every outdoor shot that just fills the screen. It does use a bit of digital colour correction for some of the night scenes but I found this created a nice look to the film.
The criticisms from people are based on the simplicity of the film from the script and dialogue to no big action set pieces.
Apparently films need cheesy Americanisms and big long drawn out fight scenes to be taken seriously.
This is a low budget film and from the first moment you hear about the escape, about 18 minutes in. that is the only thing the film focus on.
No subplots or distractions just straight to townsfolk trying to protect themselves from a slasher film like unstoppable killer.
It does lay it on a bit thick at the end and it isn’t doing anything original apart from the western feel but in modern day Australia (yes Quigly Down Under did a western in Australia first but that was during the wild west days) and you have seen it all before but that’s true of most films and this was if nothing else but entertaining.
Nice main character who’s bio if I looked it up probably has him as being in Neighbours and Home and Away and a fun villain.
Give it a go but remember you have seen this done a hundred times before ~ Lead Cenobite